An expat who appreciates the underdog, loves new challenges. appreciates good tv like Game of Thrones, House of Card, The Blacklist, OITNB, The Newsroom, Parks and Rec, Castle, Grace and Frankie. to name but a few....
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“At least we have each other.”
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Unburdened
He finds her in her office, watching the window and the street below with tired eyes. Her jacket is long forgotten, leaving her in the chenille sweater he’d presented to her with pride the other day, and his fingers itch to slide along her arms, to make sure she’s warm enough.
“Hey,” he says, closing the door behind him, restoring the barrier between her and the chaos in the bullpen.
Kate tilts her head in greeting, offering him a small smile. It’s not him, he knows, it’s the long day, the hard case.
“Brought you some food, if you want to eat. If you have time to eat.”
“Thanks, babe,” she exhales. “Give me a minute, okay?”
His head bobs. “Of course.”
Rick busies himself with clearing space for their containers, taking the food from the bag, careful not to look expectant.
“Hey, Castle?”
His head lifts to find her watching him, her face soft, hopeful. She holds out a hand to him.
“Come here?”
He makes it to her in two strides, accepting the curl of her fingers, the tug of his arm around her, the way she steps into him and fits her back to his chest.
He wants to say something reassuring, to promise they’ll get this guy before anyone else gets hurt, but he doesn’t. They both know he doesn’t have the power to make that promise. Instead he simply holds her, taking some of her burdens while he can.
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A/N: Inspired by this heart touching video I saw on Twitter.
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He’s supposed to be here.
Kate checks the time on her wrist, her dad’s watch still ticking, and brushes her thumb to Lily’s knuckles when the girl squeezes her hand in question. They’ve been waiting in line for half an hour and it’s finally their daughter’s turn to speak with Santa.
After her first viewing of Miracle on 34th Street, Lily has been persistent to meet Santa in a Macy’s. Castle, of course, was thrilled by the idea and spent fifteen minutes straight with his eyes glued to his phone, searching for the earliest opportunity.
And now, here she is with their five year old daughter, about to step up to sit with Santa, and he isn’t here.
Lily squeezes her hand again and Kate looks down to provide her daughter with her full attention.
Where is Daddy?
Kate sighs, lifts her own hand to answer,
I don’t know, baby. Should be here any minute.
Lily frowns and tilts into Kate’s side.
Kate slips her hand from her daughter’s grasp, combs her fingers through Lily’s hair. She can tell that the girl is nervous, always anxious about trying to express herself to those who don’t understand, who can’t speak her language, who never know how to handle the little deaf girl.
Kate would never change their daughter, neither would Rick - they never imagined during her pregnancy that their baby would arrive any differently, never planned or prepared to raise a child with special needs, but she wouldn’t change it. She wouldn’t change the hours she and Rick spent studying sign language, teaching Lily, ensuring she always felt that she was being heard and hearing them too. She wouldn’t change the good days, the bad; she wouldn’t change Lily.
But she would give anything to change the ache in Lily’s eyes, the frustration that purses her lips, every time she’s unable to express herself without struggle.
Lily looks around one last time, but despite how unlike it is for him not to show, her daddy isn’t here yet and time seems to be up. And while Kate can provide just as much comfort and reassurance as Rick can, Lily is always more confident in these situations when both parents are present.
“Next in line, please,” the head elf, a woman in costume with a kind smile, calls out, her gaze falling on Kate and Lily. “Come on, sweetheart. Don’t you want to meet Santa?”
Lily’s brow furrows and she glances up to her mother. She’s getting better at reading lips, but Kate knows she wasn’t able to catch all of that.
Kate simply nods forward, towards the path lit by twinkling gold Christmas lights and glittering snowflakes leading to Santa’s grotto. The enthusiastic elf employee skips on ahead of them, guiding them past a field of fake reindeer and a workshop scene full of toys, stacks of boxes wrapped in vibrant red and green patterns with big red bows. The woman in the elf costume stops once they reach the man sitting on a massive red velvet throne, allows Kate and Lily to go on ahead of her.
“Well, who do we have here?” the man in the Santa suit asks, his voice deep and rich, automatically comforting. He peers down at Lily past the fluffy white beard consuming the majority of his face.
Kate touches Lily’s shoulder, but the girl remains against her side, her lips parting but her hands limp.
“This is Lily,” Kate answers, nudging her daughter a few steps forward. Lily glances up at her, swallowing at Kate’s nod and covering the final few inches of fake snow on the floor to reach Santa on her own.
The man playing the role of the jolly Christmas legend extends his white gloved hand, waiting patiently for Lily to accept. The apples of his cheeks rise as he shakes her hand.
“Hello, Lily,” he greets, his blue eyes shining at the girl. “Do you want to sit up here with me while you tell Santa what you’d like for Christmas?”
Lily’s hands start to flutter before she looks to Kate for help, but before Kate can step in, begin to translate for her daughter, the man playing Santa lifts a hand instead.
His fingers dance, forming gestures Kate instantly recognizes. Performing flawless sign language.
Her heart skips with relief, with joy at the ecstatic expression on her daughter’s face, and then realization.
Castle.
Lily’s climbs into his lap, moving her hands enthusiastically, telling Santa all about her Christmas list, and beaming every time he answers her. Kate’s throat begins to clog, unsure which has her more choked up - the look on her daughter’s face at having someone who isn’t in their immediately family that can understand her or the fact that her husband dressed up as Santa to give her such a rare gift.
Kate watches Castle convey that he’ll do his best to fulfill Lily’s wishes, reminding her to be good, always listen to her mommy and daddy. Their little girl smiles, stretches to wrap her arms around his neck. Kate blinks away the ridiculous sting of moisture as Rick hugs their daughter back, presses a quick kiss to the top of her head, and helps her hop down from his lap.
“And my head elf has a gift bag full of treats for you,” he says aloud, pointing to the elf waiting by the exit with a clear bag overflowing with candy canes, Christmas themed chocolates, and a small stuffed reindeer.
Kate watches Lily troy over to the woman, ensuring that her attention is elsewhere before striding up to Rick. She leans over the arm of the chair and tugs the beard down to his chin, her cheeks aching with a smile as her suspicions are confirmed with his grinning face.
Kate cradles one of his cheeks in her palms. “Hey, Santa.”
“At your service,” he murmurs, winking up at her.
All she can do is shake her head before she seals her smile to his, hoping he can feel the gratitude in the press of her lips.
“I love you,” she whispers, stroking his cheek with her thumb.
“I love you too,” he hums, turning his head to dust his lips to her palm. “But our daughter is about to catch Mommy kissing Santa Claus.”
Kate immediately straightens, allowing him to reposition his beard into place, adjust the Santa’s hat atop his head. Lily is still rummaging through her treat bag, thrumming with the residual excitement of meeting with whom Kate is sure their daughter believes is the real Santa after performing what probably feels like the miracle of conversing with her so effortlessly.
“I’m just doing this gig for another fifteen minutes before the real actor shows up,” Castle murmurs just loud enough for her to hear past the muffle of the beard. “Then I’ll meet you at home, Ms. Claus.”
“Mm, good. Bring me one of those peppermint mocha coffees from the shop down the street,” she requests with a smirk.
He huffs. “Please, I’ll make you one that’ll taste ten times better when I get there.”
“All right, deal,” she chuckles, catching Lily’s approaching footsteps from the corner of her eye, her eager and impatient signing.
Mommy, let’s go.
“Oh and Castle?” He quirks an eyebrow at her. “Bring the Santa suit home with you.”
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➜Person A and person B are close friends, both wanting more, but refusing to admit it. They go to a shop/store/etc. together and A is being hit on by a stranger. A becomes fed up and say that they have a significant other. B, nearby, overhears the whole conversation, waltzes over and slips their arm around A, kissing them on the cheek. What happens next is up to you.Anonymous
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Kate’s nervous, though she isn’t sure why. Castle’s been on a pirate kick for the last month, and the nautical - charms? Metal doohickeys? - attached to the binding of the leather notebook had immediately caught her eye.
She guessed her nervousness might have something to do with going traditional instead of modern. She’d seen a beautiful crystal decanter set online from Waterford, but there was just something about leather. Kate looked at her list for the umpteenth time, making sure she’d got the timeline right.
Yes. Third year, Traditional: Leather, Modern: Crystal.
Three years. Wow. It still amazed her that they were here. That they were STILL here. Through her apartment blowing up, to nearly freezing to death; from dirty bombs, to both being shot - they’d run the gamut.
Strong arms circled her waist and a rumbled “Happy third Anniversary, Kate” voiced in her ear. She turned to her husband and handed him her gift.
“Happy third Anniversary, Rick.”
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A/N: Because the sweater reminded me of a gray, Banana Republic sweater we witnessed Beckett wear multiple times throughout seasons three, four, and five.
Set mid 3x12, ‘Poof! You’re Dead’.
(Photo not mine.)
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Part of him has grown to hate theorizing with her.
The way she drifts in closer with every word, the way her eyes light up and flicker to his lips, the way he can smell her scent and feel her warmth. The way it sinks into his skin and spreads through his blood, becomes a part of his system.
It makes his want for her so unbearably strong.
It makes his fights with Gina even worse.
“Richard, we need to talk. Now. Tonight.”
Castle drops his head against the break room’s doorframe. It’s fallen late into the evening and normally, he would recognize that there’s nothing left for him to do here, nothing left that he can do for Beckett. Normally, he would go home and spend the end of his day with his daughter, but he knows that if he goes home tonight, Gina will find out. And then she’ll show up at his door, demanding a conversation he doesn’t want to have, and they’ll end up fighting in his office.
He’s already so sick of fighting with her.
“I know, but I’m working this case with Beckett and-”
She scoffs. “Of course. Beckett.”
“Gina,” he sighs, scrubbing at his eye. “It’s not like that.”
“Sure it isn’t, Richard,” she chuckles, so bitter, coating his name in venom.
He grits his teeth, but she’s baiting him and it’s not worth it. Any time Beckett’s name is brought into the conversation, it tends to become all the more explosive.
“It’s. Not. We just caught this lead and I-”
“And what? What the hell do they need you for, Richard? You’re a writer who is supposed to be there for your books. Not to play Kate Beckett’s shadow for a lifetime,” she sneers and Rick’s blood heats from the pleasant warmth Beckett left it in earlier to a simmering boil.
“I’m not just her shadow. I help,” he snaps under his breath.
“With what? Their need for a class clown and financial donations?”
I have a hard job, Castle, and having you around makes it… a little more fun.
Castle squeezes his eyes shut.
“Gina, I’m not arguing about this,” he growls.
“Why? Don’t want to be in a bad mood for your precious detective who apparently can’t solve a case without you? She has a boyfriend now, doesn’t she?”
“Enough,” he barks, fisting his hand at his side and forcing a breath in through his nose. The bullpen at his back was empty last time he checked, but there’s no need for him to lose his temper. Not here in a building filled with people he respects and admires, not in front of Kate. “Leave Beckett out of this. We’ll talk about us after I close this case.”
“Richard,” Gina warns. “Don’t you dare hang up on-”
But he’s already withdrawing the phone from his ear, ending the call with the hard press of his thumb to the screen.
He sighs, keeps his eyes closed and head down against the frame. Until he senses her, catching the faint scent of cherries in his nose.
“Wow, Castle. Stealing my lines,” she murmurs softly and his brow furrows. He clears his throat, lifts his head, but doesn’t turn around.
“What line?”
“We’ll talk after I close this case,” she echoes, deepening her voice to imitate him. His lips quirk.
“How many times has Josh heard that one?” he risks asking, not expecting an answer to that one.
“Enough to know we aren’t really going to talk afterwards,” she admits quietly.
He almost takes another chance, inquires if the ‘about us’ she forgot to include is part of it too, but simply forces a nod. “How much did you hear?”
She hesitates and he holds his breath. “Enough,” she repeats, shifting a fraction closer at his back. “You okay?”
He wants to apologize that her name was brought into an obvious argument with his girlfriend, wants to apologize for the rude remarks Gina made even though Beckett couldn’t have possibly heard them.
Instead, he just nods again. “Yeah. Fine. So, should we-”
“Castle.” He pauses before he can finally face her. He can feel her warmth along his back and it makes him ache. The graze of her hand against his, the flirt of her fingers, makes him stop breathing. “You help.”
He turns his head ever so slightly, catches a glimpse of soft eyes that spark with resolve.
“You’re not just a shadow,” she affirms, echoing his argument to Gina. His heart swells, aiding in the struggle to breathe, but he revels in the lack of oxygen for her. “You’re an asset to this team, to me. You help. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.”
Castle swallows hard. Her hand is still lingering next to his, close enough to touch, so he does. He spreads his hand to cover the back of hers, blanketing her knuckles with the drape of his palm, fitting his fingers through hers, and squeezing.
“Thank you.”
He waits for her to withdraw her hand, slip it free from his loose grasp. They don’t do this, don’t really talk about things so personal and definitely don’t touch, but she lets her hand stay.
The soft pressure of her forehead hitting his shoulder follows, shocks him, and remains there for one beautiful moment, long enough for her to suck in a breath and sear his shoulder blade with her exhale.
It’s in that moment that he knows exactly what he wants. Now and for longer. Maybe forever. It’s all too easy for him to daydream about a forever with her.
Kate takes a step back and her hand slides from his grasp.
“Come on, let’s go get some coffee.”
Surprise flickers through his chest and at last, he turns to see her. She’s watching him expectantly, waiting.
As if the kiss of her forehead and twine of their hands never happened. He’s glad for it, for the lack of awkwardness or change. It isn’t the right time for them. Not just yet.
But soon.
“Dahl’s funeral isn’t until tomorrow morning,” he reminds her and Beckett rolls her eyes.
“I’m aware, which means we have to sit on our hands until then, so unless you’re in a hurry to get home tonight…”
Oh, oh. Wow, he adores her.
“No, no hurry tonight,” he answers quickly, smiling back at her like an idiot. An idiot who may be in love with her. “Coffee sounds perfect.”
She returns his smile with one of her own, pursed with gentle amusement and something more.
“Let me just grab my stuff from my desk and we’ll go.”
He nudges her forward with the bump of his shoulder and pushes his hands into his pocket to refrain from reaching for hers again.
“Lead the way, Detective.”
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➜6x03 - Kate does surprise Rick at the loft, instead of at the precinct. Rick is still in bed when she arrives there, so she gets in bed with him.Anonymous
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➜Hi! I was wondering if you would be able to write a insert and or post-fic chapter of Hiraeth where Lily sees Castle’s scars on his back (or he shows them to her - your choice) :)
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Thank you to @cobigbluebox for prompting this one!
(To reblog just the photo, please reblog from here.)
Wardrobe Changes
Getting Lily dressed to go to the airport is more difficult than she expects, which is a tad pathetic, since baby’s all of six months old and isn’t inclined to offer an opinion on her wardrobe just yet. Kate toys with putting her in a dress Martha had given her for no reason at all, but the bows and ruffles just don’t feel right. She considers more casual, a baseball t-shirt and baby jeans her father had slipped into her daughter’s things at their last visit, but nixes that outfit, too. Castle’s been on a book tour for the last three weeks, even she’s dressing up a little bit to meet him.
In the end, the winner is a onesie with a message across the chest and an adorable tufted tutu at the hips. She’d spotted it last week when she and Lily were out and about with Alexis, and though she’d played it cool at the time, she’d returned to buy it after they’d parted ways with Rick’s daughter.
Her husband’s going to melt when he sees it. Right there in the middle of the airport. How could he not when he steps into baggage claim at JFK to spot his kid with the words ‘I heart Daddy’ on her shirt?
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It’s not the birth announcement photo Kate had expected she would send to friends and family (not that she’d given birth announcements much thought in her adult life), but seeing the photo proofs of her infant daughter facing down a Sith lord is enough to make her heart skip a few beats.
Castle’s crazy, but sometimes his ideas just work out beautifully.
(via bunysliper)
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(To reblog just the photo, please reblog from here.)
Just for a Moment
She can’t carry Lily for long, but Kate still sweeps her daughter up with gusto, dotting kisses on her round cheeks and asking about her day with Gram and Alexis. They’ve been careful to keep business as usual for the girl, even as Kate’s pregnancy has progressed, but sometimes she spends a little extra time with her sister and her grandmother. Not that it seems like she minds, Beckett notes, as she tells her everything they’d done in a single breath. Lily relishes in having her older sister’s attention, eats up the opportunities Martha gives her to play dress-up and strut around on stage.
“I’m glad you had fun,” she murmurs, peppering another round of kisses to her baby’s temple. “Want to know something, though?”
Lily nods, toying with the lace at the bottom of her shorts. Kate grins, resting her forehead against her kid’s. She sways gently, feeling the start of a twinge in her back. She’ll have to put her down soon, but for now she can still do this.
“I missed you.”
Her daughter beams, taking Kate’s face between tiny palms and smacking a kiss on her nose. Her adorable way of saying ‘me too,’ which is usually followed up by–
“S'go pway.”
Kate grins. There it is.
“Okay, baby,” she agrees, lowering Lily to the floor. “Let’s go play.”
